Joke Thread :lol:

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 07 Jul 2022, 8:18 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 07 Jul 2022, 8:19 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 08 Jul 2022, 3:57 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 08 Jul 2022, 4:30 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 09 Jul 2022, 11:10 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 09 Jul 2022, 11:12 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 09 Jul 2022, 5:38 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 09 Jul 2022, 6:19 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by cz515 » 09 Jul 2022, 9:13 pm

Hey lazarus... if you are going to pay multiple memes can you please put them in one instead of making 4 posts. Just makes it easier
When good men and women can’t speak the truth, when facts are inconvenient, when integrity and character no longer matter, when ego and self-preservation are more important than national security — then there is nothing left to stop the triumph of evil
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 10 Jul 2022, 9:44 am

cz515 wrote:Hey lazarus... if you are going to pay multiple memes can you please put them in one instead of making 4 posts. Just makes it easier


Yeah, no worries
Sometimes I see one I just have to share, I'll bank them.
Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by cz515 » 10 Jul 2022, 12:33 pm

Its ok mate they are pretty funny
When good men and women can’t speak the truth, when facts are inconvenient, when integrity and character no longer matter, when ego and self-preservation are more important than national security — then there is nothing left to stop the triumph of evil
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 11 Jul 2022, 10:18 am

cz515 wrote:Its ok mate they are pretty funny


You should see what I'm censoring :mrgreen:

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 11 Jul 2022, 7:26 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 11 Jul 2022, 10:08 pm

womble wrote:Image


Are you on a short chain mate ???

You never seem to get out of the office and go hunting or shooting. :problem:
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by cz515 » 12 Jul 2022, 5:15 am

Hes researching Ukraine for us....so others can enjoy shooting/ hunting and get fast information
When good men and women can’t speak the truth, when facts are inconvenient, when integrity and character no longer matter, when ego and self-preservation are more important than national security — then there is nothing left to stop the triumph of evil
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 12 Jul 2022, 2:50 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 13 Jul 2022, 7:15 pm

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 14 Jul 2022, 12:13 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Sarco » 15 Jul 2022, 9:41 pm

And I always wondered!
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by mickb » 16 Jul 2022, 3:08 am

Fella walks into a bar and sees a sign"Free beer all night if you can pass the Challenge" He asks the barkeep what the challenge is the bar keep says " Well its in three parts. 1. you have to scull that whole bar spitoon. 2, My rottweiler tied up at the back is mean dog and has a bad tooth and you have to pull it out for him and 3. have sex with that old lady over there in the booth"
The fella says lets do it and everyone in the bar cheers. So up he lifts the bar spitoon and drinks all the spit , tobacco, and cigaratte butts in one long draft. Wipes his mouth and proceeds out the back to the dog where everyone can hear it yelping and yowling for a good ten minutes. He walks back in and says to the barkeep " Now where is this old lady with the bad tooth?"
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 17 Jul 2022, 5:09 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 19 Jul 2022, 12:37 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 20 Jul 2022, 5:07 am

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 23 Jul 2022, 12:43 am

"womble"

Still yet to see any Hunting related posts from you ?

:unknown: :unknown: :unknown:
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 23 Jul 2022, 10:07 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
.
And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 23 Jul 2022, 6:31 pm

A woman goes to her GP and says" Doctor, you have to help me. My husband isn't interested in me any more, we haven't had sex for over a year"

The doc replied that perhaps a counsellor could help.
"If I don't have sex soon doctor I'll kill myself" she yelled.

"OK," says the doc "as it's life and death, I have access to an experimental drug made from a rare Amazonian herb.
It's quite potent so you only need sprinkle a small pinch of the powder on his dinner whenever you need.....relief."

The woman has hubby's dinner ready as he walks in.
Telling him to wait in the dining room she puts the prescribed sprinkle over the meal.
Then she thinks to herself "been a while, may as well make a night of it and scoops a teaspoon full out of the packet and scatters it all over the plate.

She then takes his dinner to him and heads to the bedroom.

Just as she gets there she hears hubby start laughing, louder and louder.
On returning to the dining room she finds him on his knees tears, snot the works, laughing like a loon.

Naturally she thinks the doc has given her the wrong stuff.
Finally getting the old man calm enough to talk she asks him what the hell he's laughing at.

"Christ Maud, funniest bloody thing I ever saw, just picked up my knife and fork when one of the sausages jumped off my plate and started rooting the cat"
Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Oldbloke » 23 Jul 2022, 8:02 pm

:clap: :clap: :clap:
Treat trolls with the contempt they deserve.
Reminder. I am of average intelligence, therefore 50% of people are dumber than me.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 24 Jul 2022, 2:46 am

The creation of the woman.

When Adam roamed the garden of Eden, he saw how happy all the pairs of animals were, and he craved a partner. He prayed all day and all night, and in the end god answered his pleads and replied.

"Adam, what are you praying for?"

"Oh almighty god! I have seen the bliss of the animals of the land and wish for a partner! I want her to be beautiful like no other, smarter almost as you, loving, caring and passionate. She should be delicate and graceful like a swan, yet swift and nimble like a fox."

"You know Adam, that's gonna cost you an arm and a leg"

Adam pauses a moment to think before replying,

"What can I get for a rib?"
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 24 Jul 2022, 4:32 pm

WARNING RUDENESS
the easily offended should look away.

The Rudd boys have been breeding their pigs for years to try to win the Blue Ribbon at the Royal Easter Show.

Finally they have a prize winner and head up to Sydney.

On the way Dave says to Dad, "Hey Dad, youse reckon while we're in the big city without the womenfolk we could maybe visit one of them brothel places?"

"You know what Dave, I rekon we could do just that" replied Dad with a leer.

After seeing their prize boar safely tucked up in a stall at the Showground, the boys head for the bright lights.

Neither having partaken of such carnal activities before, they were a little lost.

"What's one these knocking shops look like Dad" asked Dave.
"Buggered if I know Dave, but I reckon they'd be pretty popular, eh? Just keep an eye out for likely places."

Walking up George St they come to a big Hoyts theatre with a line waiting at the ticket office.

"This must be it Dave, look at that line" says Dad.
"But Dad, some of them blokes have brung their own girl with them" says Dave.

"Well Dave, these city folk are more sophisticated than us Snake Gully folk, who knows what goes on in there" says Dad with a grin.

"Jesus Dad, what'll I ask for" asks Dave.
"Hell, I don't bloody know, just ask for whatever the bloke in front of you asks for"

Getting to the ticket office, the man in front says to the ticket seller, "Two, upper circle please"

Daves turn arrives and he says "Two up her circle please" and giggles.

The ticket seller replies, "Sorry Sir, we have no upper circle left"

At this point Dad leans in and says " Never mind love, two up her arse will do"
Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 24 Jul 2022, 10:47 pm

Out of all the medical advancements made these days, there's always some new invention that stands out from the rest.
Now they've just produced the worlds fastest acting pill to cure impotence.

It's only got "one" side effect.

If it's not swallowed quick enough you get a stiff neck.
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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