Applying for Govt job...

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Applying for Govt job...

Post by Stix » 25 Feb 2020, 10:15 am

Just thought id throw this out there...

Anyone know of anyone who is good at writing job applications etc for Govt jobs...?

There is a job i would love (dont really stand a chance) but thought its worth exposing my bald head & throwing my hat in there...but i suck at formatting those things, not to mention wording for addressing criteria--particularly given im not from within the specific industry...

Anyone have any recommendations. ..??

Cheers
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Sergeant Hartman » 25 Feb 2020, 10:24 am

Mate change your name to a girl name. Say you identify yourself as a female gender.

Actually also change preference to gay, you like other girls.

Lastly get intouched with Tassie aboriginal group to say you have aboriginal heritage.

Don't write anything just those three things, if you want extra points say you are an animal loving vegan
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by marksman » 25 Feb 2020, 10:29 am

as said above by ziad and graft Stix mate graft :lol: :lol: :drinks:
“If you do not read the newspapers you are uninformed. If you do read the newspapers you are misinformed”. Mark Twain
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Sergeant Hartman » 25 Feb 2020, 11:05 am

And to be clear you don't have to wear a skirt or high heels and lipstick (unless you like that) but in this new age, that is purely sexist stereotyping.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Oldbloke » 25 Feb 2020, 11:13 am

If u have MS office on a pc it has templates in word for CVs etc.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by StraightWhiteMale » 25 Feb 2020, 11:49 am

To be honest I have never have to do a job interview. I have always just got jobs through mates. Just do a quick internet search mate. There are companies that can prepare resumes and that letter thing for you.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by flutch » 25 Feb 2020, 11:52 am

if you have social media, make sure it has all the relevant virtue signalling on it.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by StraightWhiteMale » 25 Feb 2020, 12:04 pm

flutch wrote:if you have social media, make sure it has all the relevant virtue signalling on it.


So your saying they won't like me because I am a staright white male?
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by TassieTiger » 25 Feb 2020, 12:11 pm

Pm sent
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Stix » 25 Feb 2020, 12:18 pm

LOL you guys...

Some pretty funny stuff in there...

In actual fact, not much criteria stuff in this job...

But its not about templates...its about wording yourself to sound like you can communicate well...like every job---but this is super critical for this role...
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Oldbloke » 25 Feb 2020, 1:05 pm

Do you need to be sane? Lol
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Blr243 » 25 Feb 2020, 1:06 pm

I sometimes work for a bloke who has a recruitment business. He does extreme background checks on possible employees I’m pretty sure for military perhaps police , anything that requires security honesty all that sort of secret stuff ( when I first started working in their offices they watched me non stop in case I was some sort of terrorist wanting to hack into their computer system. But I’m too dumb for that if I tried to commit a crime with a computer i wood be caught in less than 30 mins. ) I’m fitting some sort of silly high spec security door at his office on thurs morning. I will ask him if he has any tips for you ..... I recently organised a police check certificate for myself because I thought it might look good on my new construction business website. Mostly people think of it as just a bit of paper but I’m actually a little bit proud of it. I think It’s a cool thing to have. So maybe one of those might be good but only if you have been good
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Blr243 » 25 Feb 2020, 1:08 pm

50 years of behaving myself, My god how did I ever do it ?
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Die Judicii » 25 Feb 2020, 2:28 pm

Stix wrote:
But its not about templates...its about wording yourself to sound like you can communicate well...like every job---but this is super critical for this role...


:problem: :problem:
I was part of a committee once that vetted new job applicants.
A position became available as shift manager with the engineering company I worked for.
We had six applicants to be interviewed for the position, and to this day I still remember one particular bloke.

He had spent a lot of time in the navy, and had a resume that thick that you would need a stepladder to see over the top of it.
Glowing reports of his demeanor, qualifications oozing out of it, etc etc etc.

All compiled by one of those fancy agencies.

He came unstuck in a big way when reference to a left hand thread was made by one of the committee members
The applicant actually asked what a left hand thread was, and why would such a thing exist ?

Needless to say that he wasn't successful in attaining the position. :thumbsdown:
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by knowsnothin » 25 Feb 2020, 3:04 pm

For Virtually all public sector and most semi sophisticated private sector jobs your resume will be sent through a computer and an!algorithm will decide whether to forward it to recruitment for an interview. The major online job companies/websites do this also. My advice is that if you really want the job get a professional writer to do your resume. A template from ms office is not going to cut it. You have to game the system my friend.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by StraightWhiteMale » 25 Feb 2020, 3:16 pm

Die Judicii wrote:
I was part of a committee once that vetted new job applicants.
A position became available as shift manager with the engineering company I worked for.
We had six applicants to be interviewed for the position, and to this day I still remember one particular bloke.

He had spent a lot of time in the navy, and had a resume that thick that you would need a stepladder to see over the top of it.
Glowing reports of his demeanor, qualifications oozing out of it, etc etc etc.

All compiled by one of those fancy agencies.

He came unstuck in a big way when reference to a left hand thread was made by one of the committee members
The applicant actually asked what a left hand thread was, and why would such a thing exist ?

Needless to say that he wasn't successful in attaining the position. :thumbsdown:


Like anything in life just say you can do it and figure the rest out later.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Sergeant Hartman » 25 Feb 2020, 3:27 pm

Well i didn't know that... even though likely i have seen a few left handed threads.... But not my field
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by duncan61 » 25 Feb 2020, 3:51 pm

gas bottles left hand thread
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Blr243 » 25 Feb 2020, 4:03 pm

Irresponsible me had an unsecured lpg gas bottle in the back of an open Ute once ... it rolled over and hit something and turned full on. In my rear view mirror all I could see was a big cloud of gas. I knew I had to pull over immediately and sort it so in my panic the first driveway I pulled into was that of a petrol station. That particular incident you will find on my resume
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Oldbloke » 25 Feb 2020, 4:26 pm

knowsnothin wrote:For Virtually all public sector and most semi sophisticated private sector jobs your resume will be sent through a computer and an!algorithm will decide whether to forward it to recruitment for an interview. The major online job companies/websites do this also. My advice is that if you really want the job get a professional writer to do your resume. A template from ms office is not going to cut it. You have to game the system my friend.


Correct. Has been for a few years now. My intention was that a template helps you to get started and looks good. Its the info in the template that the system scans. Must match the job PD. The use of key words in the CV they are looking for is important too.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by StraightWhiteMale » 25 Feb 2020, 4:27 pm

Blr243 wrote:Irresponsible me had an unsecured lpg gas bottle in the back of an open Ute once ... it rolled over and hit something and turned full on. In my rear view mirror all I could see was a big cloud of gas. I knew I had to pull over immediately and sort it so in my panic the first driveway I pulled into was that of a petrol station. That particular incident you will find on my resume


Blr243 is a problem solver who thinks quick under stressful situations, with amazing situational awareness he volunteers his time to to help his local community.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Sergeant Hartman » 25 Feb 2020, 4:52 pm

Ahh yep, including for welding and lpg plus i think i seen them in the headbolts/heads
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by marksman » 25 Feb 2020, 5:21 pm

Blr243 wrote:50 years of behaving myself, My god how did I ever do it ?


do what Blr :unknown:

not get caught :lol:

forgive me, l couldn't help myself :drinks:
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Stix » 25 Feb 2020, 5:35 pm

Oldbloke wrote:Do you need to be sane? Lol

:lol:

Thats... :lol: ...just so funny.... :lol:

Put you fown as a referee then..??.... :unknown: :)
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Blr243 » 25 Feb 2020, 6:23 pm

It’s true. No angel , not devil either Halfway in between I think will do me
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Member-Deleted » 25 Feb 2020, 6:45 pm

Just don't mention you are on here...

Half the sh1t you come out with on here would scare even the government away :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Wombat » 25 Feb 2020, 7:11 pm

Ziad wrote:Well i didn't know that... even though likely i have seen a few left handed threads.... But not my field


When I was younger I got roped into helping a mate pick up a 6 X 6 WW2 truck he'd bought at a clearance sale an American one of some sort, not a Blitz. We needed to change one of the wheels in the days before 12v or battery rattle guns. Hours of sweat and swearing, cans of CRC, a Propane torch, a six foot breaker bar being jumped on by the heaviest bloke etc etc.
I squatted down to hit the threads with a wire brush yet again when I noticed an "L" on the end of the stud. Four of us had been tightening the bloody thing :oops:

Some other things that DO exist are Left hand drills and Screwdriver bits. A left hand drill will often grab and remove a broken bolt if you use one to drill for an extractor. The left hand screwdriver bits are angled to minimize ramp out on undoing screws. Both these are hard to find, but do exist.
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Blr243 » 25 Feb 2020, 7:18 pm

I knew a bloke once so dumb that he did not know which way to turn on a tap ......everything in life for him must be a struggle
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by Oldbloke » 25 Feb 2020, 7:40 pm

Stix wrote: :lol:

Thats... :lol: ...just so funny.... :lol:

Put you fown as a referee then..??.... :unknown: :)


Well you wouldnt last in my job if your sane. Lol
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Re: Applying for Govt job...

Post by StraightWhiteMale » 25 Feb 2020, 8:12 pm

All this resume talk I'm getting adds for resumes on this site now.
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