My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

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My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Stix » 13 Mar 2020, 9:49 pm

So...

Went into Aldi this afternoon/evening...

I need some of that soft paper...i dont care for the purfumed pretty scented overly soft stuff that is impregnated with aloe & cleverly embossed for a frictionless glide with maximum stock removal...

Nope...

I just want a pack of fuking toilet paper...

Ok...so im not getting one here...sigh..., i said to myself while staring dumbfounded at the steel shelving with a blank look on my face, wondering what the fuk is wrong with people...

Breathe...

Ok...ill go & grab a can of baked beans &/or spaghetti incase i get away on Sat night for a quick weekend warrior paddock dissecting eye-shine covert operation...
You know...quick snack...easy ramming flavour-filled tummy filler i can just find time for when im not stuck in the burbs & there are guns to shoot...

Well...its been made very apparent to me, that i cant have, nope, not even one can of baked bloody beans...!!!!! :unknown: :twisted:

You see, i went to 2 supermarkets & 2 Aldi stores, & those sections of shelves are empty...
They've been emptied by...well, i dont mean to stereotype here...but emptied by the likes of all the fat bastards i saw walking around in pairs, or threesome's, with at least one trolley each---yes---i said ATLEAST...!!!...filling those said trolley's with instant noodles, long life milk, all my bloody baked beans, and the weeks run from the toilet paper factory...!!!

What the fuk is wrong with you lot...???

No, i dont mean you, who've grabbed a couple extra cans of baked beans...i mean YOU---!!!---who have, as ive said above, loaded up with every fuking carton you can fit in your bloody boot...!!!

You're a buch of idiots...!!!...
If you think thats going to save you in the event of a highly infectious major pandemic while you're couped up in the burbs complaining about what the Govt ISNT doing about your poor health due to your diet, then think again...!!

And i hope when you cant get any protein because you've forced the supermarkets into ration allocations, you smell my roasting goat leg & southern fried rabbit, & stamp your feet in denial while convincing yourself you find some form of solace when 60 minutes & the Project tell you you're being hard done by ...!!!
Idiots...!!... :lol:

And you know what---i hope this is left up for all to read...i dont care if someone is offended at the "social inequity" i seem to be ranting about...
People should take a look at themselves & ask, 'what will happen if this is real...?'...

I am just flabbergasted at the utter greed & incredibly abhorrent attitudes a good number of us seem to have against one another...
We seemingly "band together" when the drama filled media storm is promoting that some experience hardship in the aftermath of the devastating bush fires, but look what happens when they promote even a hint of a spreading infection...and what does this behavior tell us... :unknown:

So...now thats off my chest...can anyone spare a roll or two...seriously...im down to 2-n-a-half rolls & thats including my shooting stash.. :|
The man who knows everything, doesnt really know everything...he's just stopped learning...
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by bladeracer » 13 Mar 2020, 9:59 pm

Go to Hungry Jacks or McDonalds and grab a handful of napkins.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by duncan61 » 13 Mar 2020, 10:07 pm

I am still trying to work it out.how does toilet roll help?
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by bigpete » 13 Mar 2020, 10:22 pm

Wow
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Oldbloke » 13 Mar 2020, 10:39 pm

Fuk you must be a good typist. If you anly wore a skirt..... :D

BS aside. Wife found same thing late today. Aldi shelves close to empty. People watch way too much yank D grade doomsday tv. Yes, the virus is a concern but panic buying only makes the situation worse.
Hunt safe, look after the bush & plug more pests. :thumbsup: Better to load on the mild side. :o The greatest invention in the history of man is beer. :drinks: Practice good hygiene.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Oldbloke » 13 Mar 2020, 10:41 pm

duncan61 wrote:I am still trying to work it out.how does toilet roll help?


It doesnt.
Hunt safe, look after the bush & plug more pests. :thumbsup: Better to load on the mild side. :o The greatest invention in the history of man is beer. :drinks: Practice good hygiene.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Bill » 14 Mar 2020, 6:29 am

Maybe get up earlier, all shops have fresh supplies in the morning, went to coles on Wed and got a 20 pack of soft scented goodness :lol:
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by straightshooter » 14 Mar 2020, 6:46 am

My mind boggles that people think that the only way to achieve the modern state of cleanliness is with shop bought toilet paper.
How was it achieved in the past before toilet paper became ubiquitous?
Before one can bestow the status of 'survivor' on oneself, the a concise understanding of how to maintain inputs and how to dispose of outputs will be a prerequisite.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by wanneroo » 14 Mar 2020, 7:01 am

I always keep 50 rolls in stock and added a little more here and there over the past month. It's all gone out of the local stores now.

I grew up with hurricanes, snow storms, floods and tornadoes so I experienced various short disruptions in supplies when young. Since then I've always believed in having a little bit of everything on hand. Right now I've got free flowing mountain spring water, 30000 rounds of ammo, six months or more of food, plenty of TP, medical supplies, fuel, etc. I could hole up here in the mountains for a while.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Blr243 » 14 Mar 2020, 7:10 am

Humans are the only species that wipe their bums. For millions of years , there has probably been a million species of animals on our planet that have not wiped their bums ever. So we are doing it all wrong .... we don’t need toilet paper anymore Just go hardcore ...So I’m starting a new trend that’s about to take the world by storm
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by perentie » 14 Mar 2020, 7:22 am

Blr243 wrote:Humans are the only species that wipe their bums. For millions of years , there has probably been a million species of animals on our planet that have not wiped their bums ever. So we are doing it all wrong .... we don’t need toilet paper anymore Just go hardcore ...So I’m starting a new trend that’s about to take the world by storm


Not all Humans wipe their bums. When I was in PNG back in the 60,s the Buskanaka did not bother. Its all in the squat. They squat down low and it all happens relatively cleanly. We with out upstanding toilets deliver in a position that is not condusive to a clean delivery.
When using our Government supplied porcelain toilet with black plastic seat, it was common to see the dusty bare footprints on the plastic seat as they tried to balance and crap in the way they were used to. Sometimes it worked and sometimes not.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by TassieTiger » 14 Mar 2020, 7:39 am

Hey Stix - buy a fookin bidet mate. Saves your toilet paper and who knows - you might like it :sarcasm:
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Wylie27 » 14 Mar 2020, 8:46 am

Stores are packed after 10pm...

Stores open at 6am

You want bog roll, get there before opening...
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by Ziad » 14 Mar 2020, 9:08 am

Ahh ok stix you find me a metal lathe and i will share with you with 50% of our family stash.. At eBay prices that's probably worth 10k conservatively.

Or as Russell Coight said find a few smooth rocks. If you are a politician a rose bush will do.

People are just morons, atleast the supermarkets have stopped refunding the bog roll crazies.

And enjoy your rabbit/roo/pig/duck etc
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by 8x57 » 14 Mar 2020, 11:27 am

You can used a dried corn cob to wipe your arse with, that’s what the locals do in East Timor.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by JimTom » 14 Mar 2020, 12:07 pm

8x57 wrote:You can used a dried corn cob to wipe your arse with, that’s what the locals do in East Timor.



Can’t say that I have ever witnessed that.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by 8x57 » 14 Mar 2020, 1:58 pm

Can’t say that I have ever witnessed that.[/quote]

Not something you’d want to either I would imagine.
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Re: My Last Roll...a thread about survival...

Post by TassieTiger » 14 Mar 2020, 3:46 pm

8x57 wrote:Can’t say that I have ever witnessed that.


Not something you’d want to either I would imagine.[/quote]

Fook noooo :silent:
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