Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

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Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Die Judicii » 15 Aug 2022, 11:22 pm

Found myself in the position of having to get takeaway for lunch today.
So, I decide on Chinese.
I get a bowl of crispy pork, veg/salad and rice.

Then came the unenviable task of eating it with the supplied (legally required) "bamboo" fork.
Now,,,, when yo put these abominable "things" in your mouth they feel about as comfortable as a piece of sandpaper.
Truly disgusting,, and certainly not successful,,,,,, they won't even pierce a sprig of cauliflower or asparagras.

For the life of me, I can't figure why the bloody government banned plastic knives and forks (supposedly to save the world from plastic) and yet it
seems to be ok to leave the plastic bowls that they serve the food in. WTF :wtf: :wtf:

At least the plastic forks worked to a degree,,,, and didn't feel like a piece of sandpaper in your mouth.
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by on_one_wheel » 16 Aug 2022, 5:02 am

True

My fiance keeps a stainless steel fork in her bag for similar occasions, strangely enough though she always eats Chinese with chopsticks like a pro. She keeps a set of those in there to.
The s**t you'll find in a woman's handbag,
I should probably throw one or two in the vehicle... handbags that is :thumbsup:

On the rare occasion I eat takeaway in town it's normally finger food like HungryJims, I regret it every time, stingy ass undersized burgers with sweet FA dressing served with cold chips and a cup full of ice with a splash of cola in it... seriously depressing. to think those burgers are better than MuckDonnald's !!! Imagine how piss poor their food is.

Probably the best meal I ate away from home recently was in Adelaide at the Royal Adelaide Hospital, I was amazed to discover a massive mess hall with all kinds of international food shops there preparing freshly cooked meals, there was even a sheila smack bang in the middle banging away on a piano, (she wasn't keen on the idea of playing a duet of chopsticks though,
I might as well have asked her if she wanted to play the skin flute.)
I settled on a big Sushi pack which was full of some incredible thingamajigs that was handed to me with 2 options of eating ware ... you guests it, bamboo forks or bamboo sticks. I battled that meal with the sticks with all the coordination of someone who'd just landed on earth for the first time.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by MtnMan » 16 Aug 2022, 6:46 am

Did you not sprinkle a sachet of cement powder on first? :lol:
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by on_one_wheel » 16 Aug 2022, 7:01 am

MtnMan wrote:Did you not sprinkle a sachet of cement powder on first? :lol:


MMMMmmmm
Cenent powder
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Gamerancher » 16 Aug 2022, 8:42 am

Best example of f#*ktardery I've seen lately was a environmentally safe paper straw, it came in a plastic bag.
I tend to keep a set of fighting sticks, (cutlery) in the console of the ute.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by No1Mk3 » 16 Aug 2022, 5:46 pm

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In glove box, but I always ask for chop sticks if I get Chinese.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Fionn » 16 Aug 2022, 6:10 pm

Its a passive aggressive FU to you for trying to eat Chinese with a fork. The plastic forks didn't achieve the desired outcome so they switched it up. :lol:

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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Blr243 » 16 Aug 2022, 7:54 pm

Lantana. Spear grass. Peter foster
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Robin » 17 Aug 2022, 5:27 pm

I don't mind them, I take them camping so I can chuck them in the fire so I don't need to wash up.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by bigpete » 17 Aug 2022, 8:22 pm

Bits of plastic everywhere
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by safeshot » 17 Aug 2022, 8:51 pm

Bamboo socks are great but they take an age to dry.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Sarco » 17 Aug 2022, 9:58 pm

Need something like these. I have a couple of sets that live in a storage pocket in the 4by.

https://www.adventureawaits.com.au/prod ... 6b77&_ss=r
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by deye243 » 17 Aug 2022, 10:13 pm

Die Judicii wrote:Found myself in the position of having to get takeaway for lunch today.
So, I decide on Chinese.
I get a bowl of crispy pork, veg/salad and rice.

Then came the unenviable task of eating it with the supplied (legally required) "bamboo" fork.
Now,,,, when yo put these abominable "things" in your mouth they feel about as comfortable as a piece of sandpaper.
Truly disgusting,, and certainly not successful,,,,,, they won't even pierce a sprig of cauliflower or asparagras.

For the life of me, I can't figure why the bloody government banned plastic knives and forks (supposedly to save the world from plastic) and yet it
seems to be ok to leave the plastic bowls that they serve the food in. WTF :wtf: :wtf:

At least the plastic forks worked to a degree,,,, and didn't feel like a piece of sandpaper in your mouth.

Normally I would agree with you wholeheartedly but you should try a feeding tube up the nose and down the back of your throat for 4 months .
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Die Judicii » 17 Aug 2022, 10:42 pm

[quote="deye243"] Yeah, agreed, that would be the pits.
I've never had the displeasure of having one myself,,, but I have inserted quite a few of them into other people,,, (patients) during the 70's
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by deye243 » 17 Aug 2022, 11:25 pm

I hear you on that one and I must agree so heaven forbid we could use plastic knives and forks but we can sit on plastic chairs at plastic tables yet cut down millions of trees yes including bamboo its natural habitat to , make eating a tensils I truly believe all this environment b******* including global warming is a cult and someone's making a Flamin Fortune out of it but not us and the way this retarded country has swallowed at Lock Stock and Barrel we are going to be the poorer for it
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by on_one_wheel » 18 Aug 2022, 12:01 pm

Greenies :wtf:
We actually can't feed the current world's population by targeting net zero.

We're already seeing the effects.

Cutting back on fertiliser = lower yielding crops
No or less effective pesticides = lower yielding crops
Couple those "little" things in with failed harvests due to floods and drought and factor a growing population.
If they are correct about climate change, the footprint of arable land is shrinking... less land, less food.
Now we're seeing a push to remove or reduce meat from our diets because it requires more land and yields less protein return for the given amount of feed and water it takes to grow as compared to producing straight plant protein and eating that.


So yeah... a vegan diet or a diet that includes crickets as a source of protein is worse than bamboo forks.

They can pry my stainless steel fork and scotch fillet from my cold dead jaws.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Fionn » 18 Aug 2022, 2:44 pm

Crickets are quite nice to eat.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by on_one_wheel » 18 Aug 2022, 3:32 pm

Fionn wrote:Crickets are quite nice to eat.


They'd have to be better than stink beetles.

There's a movement towards the normalisation of eating bugs, they're being added to some regular foods and snacks targeting the trend setter market, win the hipsters over and you'll capture enough market share to stock the supermarket shelves.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by on_one_wheel » 18 Aug 2022, 3:44 pm

deye243 wrote:
Die Judicii wrote:Found myself in the position of having to get takeaway for lunch today.
So, I decide on Chinese.
I get a bowl of crispy pork, veg/salad and rice.

Then came the unenviable task of eating it with the supplied (legally required) "bamboo" fork.
Now,,,, when yo put these abominable "things" in your mouth they feel about as comfortable as a piece of sandpaper.
Truly disgusting,, and certainly not successful,,,,,, they won't even pierce a sprig of cauliflower or asparagras.

For the life of me, I can't figure why the bloody government banned plastic knives and forks (supposedly to save the world from plastic) and yet it
seems to be ok to leave the plastic bowls that they serve the food in. WTF :wtf: :wtf:

At least the plastic forks worked to a degree,,,, and didn't feel like a piece of sandpaper in your mouth.

Normally I would agree with you wholeheartedly but you should try a feeding tube up the nose and down the back of your throat for 4 months .


Now we're heading towards human centipede territory
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Fionn » 18 Aug 2022, 5:01 pm

on_one_wheel wrote:
Fionn wrote:Crickets are quite nice to eat.


They'd have to be better than stink beetles.


Haven't tried them, but they would have to better then dung beetles :lol:

Mole crickets would be my favourite.

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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Gamerancher » 18 Aug 2022, 5:08 pm

Not all farmland is arable and suited for cropping, this is where their anti-animal argument falls flat. Some land is suitable for grazing only.
You can shove your insect proteins, I'll leave that for birds and the lesser primates. I'll keep raising cattle and living on meat and vegetables thanks.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Robin » 18 Aug 2022, 9:17 pm

Fionn wrote:Crickets are quite nice to eat.


The only Cricket I like is the game
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Lazarus » 20 Aug 2022, 12:47 pm

I've used bamboo chop sticks, they were fine, but never a bamboo fork. Sounds as useful as the old fashioned shiny dunny roll.
That was the bare knuckle boxer of dunny paper, rough, tough and took no sh!t from anybody.

Bamboo as a plant is an absolute motherfcker to get rid of, I took a job digging some out when doing some random sandstone paving work.
The customer asked for a quote to remove about 20 square metres of it after I finished their paving.
Never having dealt with it it before I told them I'd have it out in 2hrs.
Took me 3 bloody days with a Kango fitted with a clay spade tip.
Hate the shyte now.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Fionn » 21 Aug 2022, 4:21 pm

Robin wrote:
Fionn wrote:Crickets are quite nice to eat.


The only Cricket I like is the game


Have you tried Crickets? they taste surprisingly good fried. A bit like fried white bait or shrimp, but not a fishy, maybe best described as slightly grassy. Great as beer drinking accompaniments.

I find grasshoppers a bit to gooey inside due to there size, much the same as tarantula spiders and scorpions.
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Re: Is there anything worse than Bamboo ?

Post by Oldbloke » 22 Aug 2022, 5:20 pm

Hey, cut that talk out. You'll put me off my Stout.
The greatest invention in the history of man is beer.
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