Funny Putdowns

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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by darwindingo » 25 Jul 2018, 12:31 am

Your a load that should have been swallowed.

I wouldn't f**k you with a dead dingo's di*k..

Step out of my way before I step over you..

:drinks:
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An "Unintended Discharge" is nothing more than the lack of appropriate safety procedures or the failure to follow them..!

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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by Die Judicii » 30 Jul 2018, 7:59 pm

And along those lines Jeff,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

"You weren't actually born,, you were shot up against a hot tin fence, and left to hatch out in the sun"
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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by Thom318 » 30 Jul 2018, 8:29 pm

I actually use these quite often
" X couldn't get a root in a whorehouse with a first full of fifties" or "couldn't organise a pi55 up in a pub on a Friday night"
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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by Tiger650 » 30 Jul 2018, 9:17 pm

You have to envisage this, from "The Saint" many years back.

Roger Moore has an oily little ethnic type offering him a dodgy proposition, Moore makes a counter proposal whereby the OLET says.

"I will have to consult with my superiors"

Moore looks down his nose at the OLET and says.

"That could be almost anybody".
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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by darwindingo » 30 Jul 2018, 10:49 pm

Die Judicii wrote:And along those lines Jeff,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

"You weren't actually born,, you were shot up against a hot tin fence, and left to hatch out in the sun"


:lol: I'll have to borrow that one mate... :drinks:
“Accidental Discharges” DO NOT OCCUR !!

An "Unintended Discharge" is nothing more than the lack of appropriate safety procedures or the failure to follow them..!

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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by Gwion » 08 Aug 2018, 1:09 pm

Thom318 wrote:I actually use these quite often
" X couldn't get a root in a whorehouse with a first full of fifties" or "couldn't organise a pi55 up in a pub on a Friday night"


Yep. My versions are work place related:
"Couldn't manage a root in a brothel"
"Couldn't organise a beer in a brewery"

And on the the road:
"Couldn't drive a greasy finger up his bum" (edited for user friendliness and to avoid offence)
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Re: Funny Putdowns

Post by SCJ429 » 27 Aug 2018, 6:28 pm

The movie Full Metal Jacket has some great put downs. The only one I can recall is "it looks like the best part of you ran down the crack of your Momma's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress"
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