TassieTiger wrote:
Next message you get from ex says, your son has refused to get blood test and if your going to make him - he’s never coming back over to you...
So he was meant to come over to yours this week as per court orders - but true to his word, he is refusing to come over because your demanding that he listen to an adult / parent and demand that he get the dr ordered blood test...
What would you do?
Bruiser64 wrote:My youngest daughter is 20, still lives with her mother and is long term unemployed and is totally financially dependent on her mother. Her mother has clearly reaped what she has sown. My daughter knows me very well. I have left her in no doubt that asking me to subsidise her standard of living will only end in tears. I have consistently stated to both my daughters that their standard of living will be commensurate with their income and their efforts: not mine. They are now adults. I will treat them like adults and I expect them to behave like adults. Unfortunately their mother when they were teenagers gave them too much authority and no responsibility.
PaddyT wrote:Gees tough one Tassie, could you get the Dr who wanted the blood test to call the mother to explain that its "kinda serious" , and the test has to be done, youd think she's at least interested in the childs welfare
brett1868 wrote:PaddyT wrote:Gees tough one Tassie, could you get the Dr who wanted the blood test to call the mother to explain that its "kinda serious" , and the test has to be done, youd think she's at least interested in the childs welfare
Great idea and my thoughts exactly and at least the ex hears it from a independent party. Maybe ask her to take the young fella to a Dr of her choice for a 2nd opinion. What I do with my son is explain it to him what is required and why we think it's important along with the consequences of not proceeding. The boy has always made the right decision because he realises that it's better to know for sure then to worry about what might be.
Whether its advice about a firearm or experiences raising kids, this is a forum and wouldn't exist if everyone had all the answers to every question.
TassieTiger wrote:Bruiser64 wrote:My youngest daughter is 20, still lives with her mother and is long term unemployed and is totally financially dependent on her mother. Her mother has clearly reaped what she has sown. My daughter knows me very well. I have left her in no doubt that asking me to subsidise her standard of living will only end in tears. I have consistently stated to both my daughters that their standard of living will be commensurate with their income and their efforts: not mine. They are now adults. I will treat them like adults and I expect them to behave like adults. Unfortunately their mother when they were teenagers gave them too much authority and no responsibility.
The decisions of your daughters/mother are now biting them for the rest of their lives...don't you think that if you had of done something different (I have NO idea what that might be) - that things might have turned out more positively ?
I 100% do wonder if this particular generation are being rail roaded into situations like your daughters now find them selves - I know SO many 25's and under that are locked in to live with their parents, have no willingness to work, nor want for that matter...and I am dreading the thought of my kids walking down this same path of welfare and basic existing...
TassieTiger wrote:I wasn’t going to post what the blood test was for just in case a dim witted ex brother stalks the site...but honestly, i think it matters not anymore.
My son was born with one kidney.
Over the last 2-3 months he has begun drinking excessive amounts of water...as in 3 litres per meal.
We went to a restaurant and he drank all of their 1.5l bottles they had prepped for the sitting.
I’ve seen him drink 7 x 500ml glasses of water with a large packet of twisters...he’d consume 7-9 litres a day.
So given his birth defect, he must be in reasonable danger of being exposed to water toxicity (ppl die from this), he would be flushing his system of required nutrients and of course - there is the possible onset of diabetes.
womble wrote:op
stand your ground. stick to your descision.
he's 14 and will keep "hating" you for many more years yet.
but you have to show him what a man does and is.
say what you do and do what you say.
he will change his mind every two weeks about everything for the next 3-4 years.
you don't get that luxury, you set an example.
he won't grow up for many more years yet, but if theres one thing he knows you for let it be your strength and resolve.
one day he will wear your shoes and he will need your example to reflect on.
unfortunately it's only then he will understand your love.
don't misunderstand, i am not say be forceful. he needs to make his own choices.
i'm saying do not negotiate or compromise your position.