Joke Thread :lol:

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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 31 Jan 2023, 7:06 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Larry » 31 Jan 2023, 7:23 am

I got the last one on the weekend.

Me Whats wrong honey.
Her Im not happy
me why
Her I am angry at you
Me why is that
Her I dont know.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by womble » 31 Jan 2023, 7:03 pm

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 01 Feb 2023, 2:52 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 02 Feb 2023, 9:51 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 02 Feb 2023, 9:53 am

Larry wrote:That last one should be on the welcome page for new users :D :lol:

G'day Larry

Or perhaps........

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Oldbloke » 02 Feb 2023, 3:44 pm

My Dear Wife, You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 57 years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don't be upset----I shall be home before midnight.

When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the dining room table:

My Dear Husband, I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 57 years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 57 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local high school. I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old. As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small difference - 18 goes into 57 a lot more times than 57 goes into 18. Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow..
The greatest invention in the history of man is beer.
https://youtu.be/2v3QrUvYj-Y
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Oldbloke » 02 Feb 2023, 9:25 pm

Good onya Kirk.

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The greatest invention in the history of man is beer.
https://youtu.be/2v3QrUvYj-Y
Member. SFFP, Shooters Union.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 02 Feb 2023, 10:25 pm

Larry wrote:I got the last one on the weekend.

Me Whats wrong honey.
Her Im not happy
me why
Her I am angry at you
Me why is that
Her I dont know.


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 02 Feb 2023, 10:35 pm

Haven't read the bible for quite a few years,,,,,,,, but I think it goes a bit like this,,,,,,,,,,,,

"And on the seventh day,,,,,,,,,, God made man,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, but,,,,,, she was only joking.
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Die Judicii » 02 Feb 2023, 10:37 pm

My dear departed Dad used to say,,,,,,,,,,, "Not often your right,,,,,,,, but yer wrong this time. :lol:
I do not fear death itself... Only its inopportune timing!
I've come to realize that,,,,, the two most loving, loyal, and trustworthy females in my entire life were both canines.
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 04 Feb 2023, 7:21 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 05 Feb 2023, 12:11 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
.
And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Oldbloke » 06 Feb 2023, 6:31 am

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The greatest invention in the history of man is beer.
https://youtu.be/2v3QrUvYj-Y
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 06 Feb 2023, 12:31 pm

A young Native American boy went up to his father and said "Father, everyone in the tribe has different names, how do we get our names?"

The father sat the young boy down beside him and explained.
"It is simple my son, when a new child is born and the father has held the baby for the first time, he closes his eyes and is led from the tepee. The father stands and contemplates the baby and when he feels the moment is right, he opens his eyes and the first thing he sees is the sign of what to choose."

The young boy is fascinated.

"When I was born" continued the father, "the first thing my father saw was the sunrise, so he named me Red Sky, your mother was so named because her father saw a little sparrow.
Why do yo ask, Two Dogs Fukking?"
Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 07 Feb 2023, 10:04 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 08 Feb 2023, 10:54 am

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From the new Sesame Street Up Late show
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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 09 Feb 2023, 8:02 am

What's the difference between light and hard?



You can go to sleep with a light on.
Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 09 Feb 2023, 8:09 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
.
And that's why life is hard
User avatar
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 10 Feb 2023, 7:15 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
.
And that's why life is hard
User avatar
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Oldbloke » 10 Feb 2023, 3:03 pm

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-02-10/ ... c_news_web

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The greatest invention in the history of man is beer.
https://youtu.be/2v3QrUvYj-Y
Member. SFFP, Shooters Union.
SSAA, the powerful gun lobby. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 11 Feb 2023, 1:26 pm

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 12 Feb 2023, 8:19 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 13 Feb 2023, 8:26 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 15 Feb 2023, 9:04 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 16 Feb 2023, 6:34 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 17 Feb 2023, 7:25 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 18 Feb 2023, 7:16 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
User avatar
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 19 Feb 2023, 7:10 am

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Courage is knowing it might
hurt, and doing it anyway.
Stupidity is the same
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And that's why life is hard
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Re: Joke Thread :lol:

Post by Lazarus » 20 Feb 2023, 10:26 am

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Courage is knowing it might
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Stupidity is the same
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